I felt defeated.
It was a feeling that I honestly could not "shake off" with a glass of wine, exercise, a psychologist appointment, a movie...nothing. It just stuck. Why? Because it was about my kid. My kid is three and a half years old and still does not eat anything except 8ozs of the probiotic and fiber pediasure "grown and gain" via playtex bottle every 3 to 4 hours a day. Just like a newborn, still wakes up at night hungry and I get up and feed just to make sure nothing interferes with development.
To make a long story short after visiting many doctors the diagnosis was Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). I bought every book out there, scheduled occupational therapy (OT) and feeding therapy with a speech language pathologist (specializing in feeding) including a one month "intensive feeding" therapy where I was also "trained" using the Applied Behavior Analysis ( a.k.a. ABA) approach to feed my child as her primary caregiver.
Sounds like everything should have worked, right? well, no, it did not. My therapist's words of comfort? "This is not a sprint, its a marathon", i.e., this will take time.
Socially, it is hard having to explain why my kid does not eat yet. SPD is not talked about much. I found the reason behind this is because it is not in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) -a guide used by clinicians in diagnosis. Also, categories of SPD are not always clear cut and can overlap. It is a web and a maze altogether. I have empowered myself through knowledge and self-education and explained to those interested that my kid is not "manipulating" by not eating.
As per Carol Stock Kranowitz, M.A.,
Sensory processing is the neurological procedure of organizing the information we take in from our bodies and the world around us for use in daily life. Sensory processing is dynamic, ceaseless, and cyclical. It occurs in the nervous system, which consists of 100 billion neurons, a spinal cord, and a brain...it is critical to understand that no matter how much advanced brain power a child has, intelligence alone is not sufficient for organized, daily functioning if the underlying senses are not in good working order. A child's smooth development depends on smooth sensory processing.
I turn to God for spiritual help and ask him for clarity, patience, motivation to help my kid and all others overcome SPD. Through this blog, I will share websites, apps, products, activities, events, places, etc. that help my kid. I assume that if you are reading this, you or someone you know is going through something similar. Lets create a support group and educate our community, help our children or friends.
I will never stop celebrating my kid's life. She is the most beautiful blessing life and God has given me. Today we baked a "sensory" cake, put some frosting, sprinkles, three candles (pink, blue and green) and sang happy birthday (just because!). Huge win! My kid had a tiny taste from the spoon. I am not a professional therapist, in fact, I am far from it. Just a sensory cake mom trying her best. Lets wish for many more to come.
Cake kisses,
The Sensory Cake Mom
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